


Something Borrowed

by ZiefaB



Series: MCU [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Spoilers, Character Death, Injury, Loki is Soft, Multi, Protective Frigga (Marvel), Thor (Marvel) is a Good Bro
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-03
Updated: 2019-01-03
Packaged: 2019-10-03 18:47:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17289431
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZiefaB/pseuds/ZiefaB
Summary: Loki's efforts didn't seem to be enough





	Something Borrowed

The first time Frigga held the little blue baby boy in her arms she immediately fell in love with him. The little baby had been crying for a good couple of hours and every last person in the court had tried every single little thing they could think of to make the new little prince stop wailing and sobbing, but they had failed. Frigga had returned from a trip to the royal gardens of Asgard with her closest friends. She had heard about the new addition to the family, but from the way Odin had talked about the little boy, she had thought he was talking about yet another dog. (Odin really had a problem with adopting too many dogs. At least he took good care of them.)

When Frigga saw the little blue boy she rushed over to him and picked him up with careful hands. When Loki looked up into his new mother’s features the sobs ended like in a wall and the two of them stared at each other. The entire hall had fallen quiet with the sobs and the maids and Frigga’s friends stared at the two. It was like an enchantment had fallen upon them. From that moment on Frigga was always there when Loki needed her.

Growing up Thor always used to tease and bug Loki, but what Loki would never tell him, was that he loved having a brother. He loved that someone was paying attention to him almost constantly. Even if Thor was annoying him most of the time every once in a while he put all that aside and could invest several days in a game or in playing with Loki. Those were Loki’s favourite days and he hated how seldom they occurred. 

Especially as the two boys grew older these moments grew scarce because Odin was always demanding Thor to train with him. Loki hated him for it. He didn’t have many friends in the castle or the entire city for that matter. If he felt bad because he hadn’t seen his brother in several days because of his “oh so important training” he always wound up in Frigga’s company. He knew he could always trust his mother.

When Odin was in a particularly foul mood Frigga would take her boys with her and go on a little vacation. They would pack a magical basket with food and go for a special kind of camping trip in the large royal gardens. No matter how much they ate from the basket, it never got empty. No matter how hard Odin tried to find them to have someone to take his anger out on, he never did. The gardens shielded them and kept them safe, kept them hidden until Odin calmed down and apologised for lashing out on his family and closest friends. What the boys didn’t know was that it was actually Frigga keeping them hidden, not the gardens on their own.

The times Frigga wasn’t there to keep her boys safe and hidden were some of the worst moments of Loki’s life. When the brothers heard Odin’s booming voice rumble throughout the castle they hid. Thor would pull Loki close and try to keep him safe. Thor did his best, but if he left Loki for even the shortest while Odin always seemed to find the young prince. Loki never talked about what happened when his father locked the doors behind him and Thor couldn’t get back to Loki’s side. All Thor knew was that one time Odin burst through the doors cursing and screaming at the raven-haired prince with a bleeding arm. Thor glanced inside and all he had time to see before the door slammed shut again was Loki’s terrified eyes, the knife he had summoned in his hand and the marks on his back.

Loki didn’t have an easy time growing up. He was the outcast, the younger prince and the one who found out he wasn’t who his parents had told him he was. The day Loki found out about not being a true Asgardian was dangerous for everyone in the vicinity. The aftermath of the fight between the raven-haired prince and his father, the king, took weeks to clean up. After this, the rest of the court avoided him even more, but now they did so because they knew he was stronger than his father. Odin didn’t speak to his son in weeks and the relationship between father and son got even worse.

Tears were never really something Loki let himself experience. Thor wore his heart on his sleeve and showed all his emotions without a second of doubt or hesitation, which cost him several times. But emotions suited the older prince and it made the Asgardians feel more connected to him, which lead to his overwhelming popularity. Loki tried to keep his emotions to himself and ever really cried in front of Frigga. He had never felt safe around Odin, even when he didn’t yet know Odin’s real reasoning to adopt him or that he even was adopted in the first place. The reason why Loki didn’t want to show his emotions to his brother was that he didn’t want to seem weak. Thor’s opinion of him meant too much to be tainted by feelings weakening him.

The time Loki cried the most was when he heard of Frigga’s death. It felt like he had been the one stabbed in the heart, not her, and the pain never really left him alone after that night. When the news reached him he crumbled. Loki was thankful that he had been alone at the time. At first, he had been quiet for a very long time. Slowly the sobs took over, shaking his body so much his knees buckled underneath him. He crashed to the ground and wrapped his arms around himself. He cried for hours until there were no more tears left to cry. He didn’t get up from the floor in days, he didn’t eat in weeks.

After trying to invade earth to get his brother’s attention he had calmed down a lot and was actually trying to prove that he was an okay person. He tried to show his emotions more and help the Avengers among others, but he got ridiculed every time. Soon he stopped trying. Until he got called by his brother to help him save Asgard. Loki was beside himself with joy that he was getting to reunite with his brother. The mission had its ups and downs, but they saved their people and Loki was hoping everything would turn to the better now.

 

“WE NEED TO ABANDON SHIP! I REPEAT. WE NEED TO ABANDON SHIP!” The screams of the Asgardians,  _his people,_ reached Loki’s ears from every direction. He tried to save some of them, but no one could fight back against Thano’s and his henchmen. One after the other he saw his people fall and he could do nothing. He had never felt so helpless. When he saw his chance to take down the giant purple alien he tried his best, but his efforts weren’t enough. Just like they never had been.

As he felt the giant’s hand tighten around his neck he looked Thor in the eye and told him what he wished he had told him all those years ago when Thor had kept him safe from their father.

“Th-Thor…” Loki had difficulties trying to get the words to form.

“Oh, is the little ice-bastard trying to speak to his brother one last time?” Thano’s henchmen laughed and Loki’s blood boiled.

“Y-you were… the best br-brother… I c-could’ve ever… asked for… I’m… sorry… my time… w-was only… s-something b-borrowed…” The world went black in Loki’s eyes. The last thing he heard before he slipped into unconsciousness was Thor’s screams and sobs begging him to not give up. But the darkness was so inviting.

The darkness was peace. At last.

* * *

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so sorry for any pain I caused, I truly am


End file.
